Taylor Swift’s dating history has been covered a thousand times over, so I’m not going to go into a lot of detail about past relationships, which songs were written about whom, which breakup was the most dramatic, etc. Although… I did make some charts! Because it’s really important that we approach this subject with an analytical mind. This isn’t just fun and games, people! If we want to graduate top of the class with a degree in celebrity couples, we need to take this stuff very seriously.
First up we have:
What we can learn from this very important and serious data:
Four months was the sweet spot for Taylor’s loves for a while. She has clearly moved into serious/long term territory now, but for most of her adult life, boyfriends could expect to get the boot around the 4-month mark. Is this information important in any practical sense? No. But write it down, it might be on the final. (Just like real college!)
Next up:
What we can learn from this very important and serious data:
Taylor likes a warm body in the chilly months. Most of her relationships started in the fall and ended in December/January. Also worth noting – until the long-term phase began in 2015, she was consistently single in May and June (and March and April, with the one Lucas Till exception). What will we do with this newfound knowledge? I don’t know. But it may be on the final!
A Hiddleswift Interlude
Before we talk about Joe, I want to share my personal favorite Taylor past relationship: Tom Hiddleston. The pair seemed so unlikely, but they were super adorable (and lanky!), and I was (still am) very into it.
They seemed to spend most of their short relationship walking on beaches, including one instance with his mother present. And of course, we can never forget Tom’s “I ❤️ T.S.” tank.
P.S. If you are a Hiddlestoner, take a minute to read this lovely The Toast article: If Tom Hiddleston Were Your Boyfriend
Now lets get into Taylor’s current relationship with Joe Alwyn.
The Beginning
We didn’t know it at the time, but Joe & Taylor started dating pretty soon after things ended with Tom. They intentionally kept things quiet and tried to keep out of the public eye. I’m truly shocked that they succeeded, considering paparazzi are waiting around every corner trying to catch photos of Taylor’s every move. Props to Taylor’s security team! Or whichever staff are responsible for that kind of thing?
Although it’s unclear, rumor has it that the two met at a celebrity-packed (secret) Kings of Leon concert that Taylor attended with Lorde, Cara Delevigne, Dakota Johnson, and Martha Hunt.
The two were apparently traipsing around London in the following months wearing full disguises.
The relationship officially went public in 2017.
2019
In early 2019, Taylor skipped the Grammy’s to attend the BAFTA’s with Joe, where his film (The Favourite) was nominated for multiple awards. Things must be pretty serious for one of the biggest pop stars of all time to skip the biggest music awards ceremony of the year!
It’s hard to find a lot of information on these two, as they both keep pretty quiet about it. You can find lots of articles that say “a source told us” followed by vague claims like “Joe is really serious about Taylor, he even has pet names for her cats,” or “Taylor and Joe have talked about getting engaged, but the cats just aren’t ready,” or “Joe and Taylor have talked about having kids one day, but they have to wait until the cats die because the cats will kill any competition for Taylor’s affection,” etc. But I’m pretty sure that “a source told us” always means “we made up this vague quote,” so we’ll just stick to what we know.
Here is literally the only thing Joe has said publicly: “I’m aware people want to know about that side of things. I think we have been successfully very private, and that has now sunk in for people … but I really prefer to talk about work.”
Taylor has made it clear that the song “Gorgeous” is about Joe, so I guess that’s the only info we are getting from her.
“You’re so gorgeous/ I can’t say anything to your face/ ‘Cause look at your face/ And I’m so furious/ At you for making me feel this way/ But what can I say?/ You’re gorgeous”
Well, that and this one Instagram post wherein she raves about The Favourite.
The Future?
Taylor didn’t make much of an effort to keep her relationships private in the past, so maybe it’s a good thing that they’ve kept this low-key. Taylor wrote an article in March of 2019 detailing 30 things she learned before turning 30, and the 8th item seems to give reason to her secrecy:
“For too long, the projected opinions of strangers affected how I viewed my relationships. Whether it was the general internet consensus of who would be right for me, or what they thought was “couples goals” based on a picture I posted on Instagram. That stuff isn’t real. For an approval seeker like me, it was an important lesson for me to learn to have my OWN value system of what I actually want. “
The man has lasted through 2 Januarys and 8 four-month periods, so this may be one for the long haul. The data supports their love! I, for one, am rooting for them and their beautiful blonde selves to stay together forever.
Links & Photos
The Toast — If Tom Hiddleston Were Your Boyfriend
Taylor Swift — 30 Things I Learned Before Turning 30
The Jonas Brothers Got Bit By The Love Bug
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WILL IT LAST? 
While I miss the days when Taylor was naming names in her songs, I’m glad she seems to have something real with Joe! Great read. Loving this blog !
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