Bachelorette Notes & Obituaries, S15 E3

This week brought us the usual drama we crave – hospital visits, more chicken nugget tosses, shade-filled toasts, and jealous rages. Let’s get into a few of my thoughts on this weeks episode:

Tyler G. is Apparently Not Acceptable

Last week I wrote that Tyler G. seemed to be of “acceptable quality” after his date with Hannah. But this week Hannah casually mentioned that he had been sent home. According to the internet, it was because it came to light that he is actually a (potentially, but probably) terrible human who is very misogynistic. There aren’t many details, but if the show’s producers felt the need to send him home, I’m gonna guess they found enough dirt on him for it to be a genuine liability, considering the kind of things they have let slide in the past. Sooooo… maybe not as acceptable as previously believed?

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Luke is Still a Dirtbag

For those expecting more upsetting behavior from Luke, he did not disappoint. One week after telling Hannah that he was “starting to fall in love” with her, Luke said “I just don’t know that I’m in love with her,” and talked about potentially leaving.

At the beginning of the photo shoot group date when the guys thought they would be posing with actual human supermodels, Luke talked about how uncomfortable it would be to interact with models in front of Hannah. I’m not sure if it’s because he wouldn’t be able to keep his hands off of them or if he *thinks* they wouldn’t be able to keep their hands off of him and believes that Hannah would give a crap about that – either way, it’s creepy. Later in that date, he went into a jealousy psychosis after seeing her interact with the other guys and literally followed her around the rest of the day stalking her every move and conversation. He kept asking her to talk to him and completely disregarded her wishes each time she asked him to wait until she was ready to talk.

When they finally did talk, she told him that the way he acted like he was owed time with her made her uncomfortable and asked him to cool it and give her some space. He responded as one would expect.

Kristen Bell Narcissist GIF by SAG Awards

I don’t like to write things that are too unkind here, because I know these are real people with real lives and feelings. But Luke is genuinely scary and not in a funny way. The stalking, the jealousy, the lack of boundaries, the effort to control, disregarding Hannah’s direct wishes – these are all abuser red flags and it’s really uncomfortable to watch. Hoping he is the one we see Hannah tearing to shreds in the season previews and that he does not show up in Bachelor in Paradise.

Forgive Us, John Paul Jones

The internet was really not taking John Paul Jones too well after the first couple of episodes. But as the season has progressed, John Paul Jones has proven to be like a fine wine whose taste has greatly improved with age. John Paul Jones is just here to have fun, drink champagne, and munch chicken nuggets. This dude is major Bachelor in Paradise material.

The Front-Runners

Jed: Jed and Hannah had their sweet chicken nugget moment, and she seemed to really connect with him during the childbirth simulation (which is kind of weird, but ok).

Luke: The internet likes to call Luke a front-runner, but I think he is dead in the water. Hannah is starting to catch on to how much he sucks.

Tyler: Tyler is definitely a little in love with his own hotness, but he seems like a fun/good/sweet guy, and I think Hannah is feeling him. He hasn’t gotten a ton of screen time, but that may be a good sign.

Garrett: Garrett is another low-screen-time guy that I think will be around for a while.

Peter: Peter is dreamy as ever and they had some really sweet moments together. The chemistry is definitely there – time will tell if more develops.

Connor: Connor definitely won her over with the sweet notes he left her during the sick-in-bed date. Not sure it he will be hometowns material, but I think he will make it a few more weeks at least.

Mike is Still the Best

Mike got genuinely vulnerable this week while sharing that he lost a baby during the second trimester with his ex-girlfriend. It was a really sweet moment with Hannah that Cam did his darndest to ruin. On top of the sweet/hard talk, Mike continued to bring the heat with his honesty and humor. He has a way of being direct and honest in the hard moments without the scary rage/passive-aggressive thing that a lot of the guys on the show (every season) seem to have.

My favorite Mike moment this week was when Cam gave a speech to the rest of the guys about how he needed everyone to back off and give him time so he could have an important conversation with Hannah. After everyone else looked around at each other with looks that ranged from confused to pissed, Mike just said, “BS. No. There are no rules of engagement.”

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Jonathan Took One For The Team

After Mike shared about Cam’s obnoxious interruptions with a few of the guys, Jonathan took it upon himself to make a great sacrifice in the name of petty revenge. When Cam finally got his chance to talk to Hannah, Jonathan immediately entered and began hassling Cam to leave so that he could talk to Hannah. Cam, a man of obviously weak will, gave in pretty quickly and left the room. While Jonathan achieved the goal of petty revenge, this behavior was obviously and understandably annoying to Hannah, who sent him home at the end of the episode.

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Chicken Nuggets

In a sweet moment between Jed and Hannah, he had her throw a chicken nugget off of a roof and make a wish. I’m gonna need someone to throw a at least one chicken nugget in every episode now, please.

Who Went Home This Week

Some Tweets That Made Me Laugh

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  1. This is my second season to watch (well, first Bachelorette, after watching Bachelor for the first time but what ever) thanks to Kat! Now I can’t stop. It’s like a train wreck that you can’t take your eyes off of. Your assessment of the season so far has been hilarious. My favorite so far is Jed.

    Keep up the good work.


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